I Am Woman Hear Me Roar Unless I Use a Word You Don't Like

If you are easily offended stop reading now. I'll be offering my opinion on a word that some find highly offensive.

Also the word I am discussing in this post comes nowhere close to the R word. The R word targets a group of people who are often defenseless with no voice or without someone who will defend them if they are able to use their voice. If you can't see the difference among the two then think a little harder about it.
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This week a new burger joint opened in Waco. It is called Fat Ho Burgers. It's making the news and not just on a local level. I understand that the word ho can be highly offensive to some regardless of how it is used and I respect your opinion if you do. Personally I don't use the word, but I am not offended when I hear it either in passing conversation or if I am called one.

So that should be that. A burger joint opens and based on its service and food quality it will stay open or not. But no. Little busy bodies who tout that they are successful business women have to interfere. I'm not bothered that they find the restaurant's name distasteful. Everyone has the right to his or her opinion and the right to decide whether or not to frequent a business. However what does bother me other than them wanting the government to censor a word they find offensive is their attitude that suggests they think they are acting selflessly and are saving a community from self-destruction by explaining to the business owner what ho really means and how it is offensive to any woman within earshot of the word. The first thing that irks me is that I'm a woman and being called a ho is the absolute least of my worries in life. I don't appreciate them speaking on my behalf. The second thing that irks me is that the owner is a 23 year old woman who I assume lives in the same area of her business so she understands the majority of her customer base and whether they will take offense. She put herself through college and she saved up enough money to venture out on her own to buy and run a restaurant. She's certainly no fool. I don't think she's too stupid to know the different meanings and uses of ho. I'm sure she doesn't appreciate being told that she is putting down all women when she uses it and she doesn't need a history lesson on women's suffrage. She hasn't asked for help in changing the name of her business but even so, the offers have come because they in their glass houses know better.

I haven't decided exactly where their misplaced sense of charity comes from, but I think I might know what part of the cause is. They have some sort of misguided sense of feminism. Feminism run amuck. Or maybe it isn't run amuck- maybe that's just feminism. The definition of that word and the levels of feminism get a little blurry to me. Don't get me wrong I believe any woman can do anything she sets her mind to. I believe a woman doing the equal work of a man should earn the equal pay of a man. I can get just as sweaty as a man when there is work that needs to be done, but I also know how to play it smart and get out of doing that hard work if I can use my womanly wiles to do so. God made man and woman differently and I have no shame in that and it leaves me with nothing to prove. But I don't think that a feminist can have her cake and eat it too. She can't scream that women are just like men and are strong and how she can take care of herself without any man's help and then cry in the corner when someone uses the word ho. She can't be so full of herself to assume that when that word is used that she is being made a victim. She certainly can't assume that women who have no shame associated with that word are ignorant or are damaging what they claim they have worked so hard to fight against. They insist that word creates victims out of women because the use of it is so demeaning a woman who hears it enough loses all self respect and worth.

I have news for them. The use of that word isn't what creates victims. The casual use of the word ho isn't what causes a woman to feel so unloved and unworthy that she is willing to remain in a relationship that is abusive. I'm not a counselor or psychologist so I don't even begin to know how a woman comes to that kind of view of herself. But I do know that acting haughty and lofty towards a woman who uses the word ho in her daily vocabulary or treating her as though she is an ignorant woman oblivious to her own hate mongering doesn't do a thing to help those women who are truly victims. I wonder if all those offers of money that are coming to Ms. Evans to pay for new menus and advertising if she changes the name of her restaurant to something that doesn't include the word ho are refused,as I suspect they will be, will instead be donated to Advocacy centers and after school programs to instill self confidence and worth in young girls and women so that if they are called a ho in an actual demeaning tone they can hold their head up high and walk away unscathed. Maybe if more time was spent on actually showing a girl her worth and how God intended her to be precious and treasured and uniquely different than men we would have more women who can find a better life around people who actually love and accept them. A campaign to stop the use of the word ho on a sign in a small Texas city isn't going to do a thing to change the attitudes this group of business women claim to abhor. They should instead try focusing on those women and girls they proclaim they are trying to protect by telling them they are worthy and priceless and that word does nothing to shape who they are or who they will be. I guarantee a woman who has been victimized to the point of having no self worth isn't going to be impacted in the slightest by seeing the name of a restaurant change from Fat Ho to something else. But I'm not sure that those successful business women leading the charge for the name to be banned are able to see my point through the lofty glances they have for Ms. Evans or anyone who defends her right to call her restaurant whatever she wants.

I wonder if they know they have unwittingly helped Ms. Evans. They have created a huge amount of free advertising for her. I probably would have never heard of the restaurant if it wasn't for them and even if I had, I probably would not have tried it. But now I will. And if the food is good, I will be back. And that is the way entrepreneurship is supposed to work.

And just on a side note. I heard a discussion on this topic on NewsTalk 1230. A caller against using Fat Ho seriously suggests that a better name would be Charlie's Angels or Evans' Angels. Yes, that's a much better choice not only because it's as cheesy as can be, but because that show didn't exude sexism in the least. I guess it's bad to use the word ho, but it's okay to insinuate that Ms. Evans is a pimp with her angels.